As I'm sure my friends and coworkers can attest to, I'm a bit of an odd duck in life. The very nature of my "character" promotes the question: Am I eccentric, weird, or just plain insane? I would like to think that I am merely eccentric mixed in with some charisma and charm. I certainly seem to occupy a rather unique niche in life.
I was conservative during my teens and early twenties but couldn't be more liberal if I tried at this point in my life. I thought of myself as a bit of a surf bum during the two years that I lived on Kauai, my life's desire being only to ride the perfect wave. (More on those exploits later)
I've been a huge nerd/geek almost all of my life. I am constantly reading science fiction novels, Frank Herbert's "Dune" being my favorite of all time (I'm sure I've read all 6 books originally written by him at least 10 times now). I am a comic book fan with X-Men and Elfquest being seminal works to me. As much as I try to leave comics behind, the more they seem to suck me back in. Star Trek in it's various incarnations has always been a favorite of mine though I'm not so much of a nerd as to be caught at a convention dedicated to the franchise.
I have an almost unhealthy obsession with a certain Dave Matthews Band. I travel 400 hundred miles by car every year to see them for three nights at the Columbia Gorge in Washington. I love my band so much that I felt compelled to get their signature fire dancer tattooed on my right thigh. In an odd pairing, I am a huge fan of electronic music also, with the sub-genre of "Drum and Bass" being a favorite of mine. I was a metal head in high school, listened to nothing but country for a couple of years in my early twenties and absolutely love a genre of music called "Trip Hop" that no one has ever heard of.
I'm going to be 39 in in under 3 short weeks yet I still feel compelled to play video games. Back in my Spokane days, I was the public enemy #1 for most of the wives and girlfriends of guys who I converted to Xbox junkies due to a little game called Halo. I used to hold parties at least once a month when all my friends would bring their Xboxes and TV's over to my apartment so we could hook them all together and play Halo until 5 in the morning. Nowadays I've toned things down a bit but have been know to still stay up until 5 in the morning playing games like Mass Effect and Borderlands.
I am a rather large fan of Anime and have been so for close to 25 years now, all starting with a little show known as Robotech. Macross, Gundam and Ghost In The Shell are particular favorites of mine. I've owned numerous copies of Akira now and even had an infatuation with the counter culture film Heavy Metal when I was in my teens. I know far more than I care to admit about Dragonball Z.
I love my action sports and have a dubious reputation for getting hurt while participating in them. I love to mountain bike and have found just about every way to fall off or crash my bike. I've nearly been impaled, fallen down a ravine and even broken my right arm and 3 ribs in the pursuit of speed. I've had plenty of "yard sales" while skiing, usually while hot dogging underneath the chairlift. I've hit my head so hard on the bottom when bodyboarding that on one occasion my forehead swelled up ferociously and then proceeded to drain into my eye sockets, giving me not just one, but two black eyes at the same time. Another time I was trying to look cool while trying pull off a trick or two on a wave and them proceeded to crack my head on the bottom hard enough to cause a huge gash requiring stitches.
When I was 26, a 41 year old personal trainer/aerobics instructor had a very unhealthy obsession with me. Needless to say I had my "Mrs. Robinson" moment during that point in time. I have the worst luck with women of anyone that I've ever met (just ask about my last relationship....if you have like two hours to kill just to get the Cliff Notes version). I find exotic women absolutely fascinating. I'm happily single at close to 39. Some people say I hate babies and children but I just pretend I do (though I have absolutely NO intention of having them myself).
I was an obnoxious frat boy (oh wait, I'm still obnoxious).......from the time I was 20 until I was nearly 28. Notable experiences from that period include getting caught stealing a No Parking sign by the campus cops, gobbling like a turkey while standing on a barstool, making out with two women at the same time, and inciting the worst drunken toga party this side of the movie Animal House.
I talk to myself....constantly. I also talk to my dogs like they are people all the time. Jack has been known to shower with me. Both dogs insist on sleeping underneath the covers with me, even during intimate moments (with women, not the dogs). Jack has broken my nose for me and Carter recently decided to scratch my cornea to the point that it required a trip to the emergency room.
I have opinions.....about EVERYTHING! I'm not afraid to express them either.... often with unintended consequences. I hold a Doctorate in sarcasm (though I've tried to curb that as of late). I consider myself to be a bit of a "rogue" or "maverick". I hate authority. I refuse to sell my soul to any establishment but am fiercely loyal to certain bands (see above), sports cars (Porsche) and seem to be some kind of unwitting Apple fanboy. I work in the medical field but absolutely loathe patient contact (I work in the lab). I work with very strange people who find me to be far more strange than they could ever be. I laugh at my own jokes that no one gets. I have my own language consisting of backwards words, anagrams that I make up, juxtaposed phrases, Hawaiian slang (pidgin) and alternate pronunciations of common words (I tell everyone I work with that they have to learn to speak Jon as a language). I talk about myself in the third person and believe I have an evil twin named NoJ. I love English humor, the more dry it is, the harder I laugh. I tell everyone that I love them when I get drunk. I'm extremely clumsy. My first name is Jon and my middle name is Wayne (named for my grandfathers but you can guess what my nickname is). I like to believe that Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes is modeled after me. I'm very happily Agnostic. I think the world is going to end tomorrow via some plague of unknown sort. I write ridiculously long blogs about myself.
I abhor pop culture but can be obsessed with it. I think reality television is evil. I often become fixated on cult films, watching them numerous times a month at time. Examples include Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, any Connery era Bond film, Pulp Fiction, Ice Pirates, The Big Lebowski, Monty Python and The Holy Grail, and V for Vendetta. I cry every time I watch Forrest Gump. I think England's Top Gear is the best television program EVER (not to mention the funniest).
I really could go on forever and ever.... It takes a very long time to get my personality and I'm SURE most of the people I meet think I'm insane. I still cling to the idea that I'm merely charismatic and eccentric. Usually the more charismatic and eccentric a person is, the more I like them..... and I wouldn't have it any other way!
Would you like to play
With the thought of a friend
In a distant passing stage?
